Think about it this way. I remember my first day of my first year in law school, my law professor called me for oral recitation and I, who didn't really expect to be called that day and didn't really care either way, gave a brief, over-generalized answer, and she said to the entire class (I'll never forget): "And they say you can't sail your way through law school." She was being witty and sarcastic at the time but, in retrospect, I realized she was right in more ways than one. No, I did not sail my way through law school. I went freaking white-water rafting through it. Regardless, that pretty much describes my entire life: I sail through it. And because I haven't had any serious snags, I go through life with the entirely wrong assumption that this must be what others are experiencing as well. No hardship. Everybody taking things easy. If life was just so, would there even be crime?
My psychology is projection. I try to be fair and believe that others do so, too. I try to be honest and assume that others are, too. This is probably not the right mindset to have, considering my profession, but.... I really do want to believe the best in people, because in my mind fairness and honesty and trustworthiness are characteristics that everyone would naturally strive for. But I'm not looking at the big picture, am I? Because I'm looking at the world through mirrored glasses, I fail to see the other side.
So today, I learned a hard lesson, and now my eyes are open a little wider.
Very nice reflection of thoughts.
ReplyDeleteBut in my opinion, one should not be bothered about fairness. One should be only bothered about he manages to sail through the treacherous world in front of us. looking at others sail and comparing in terms of fairness or honesty, is just a distraction.
I don't term it as "bothering with fairness" because that suggests effort. I don't force myself to do it. I consider it a natural aspiration and I thought it's common enough, but now I learned that it is not so. At least, not for everyone.
ReplyDeleteAnd I don't compare myself with others as much as possible. That's actually the problem. I don't pay as much attention to others as I probably should. I just assume they will do I would do given a situation. But that kind of approach is a little like blind leading the blind. It's counterproductive.